frankv74 Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 The following questions were set in last year's GED examination These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)............oh and ....they WILL breed! Q. Name the four seasons A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists Q. How is dew formed A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire Q. What causes the tides in the oceans A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election Q. What are steroids A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs (Shoot yourself now , there is little hope) Q.. What happens to your body as you age A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery (So true) Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes A. Premature death Q. What is artificial insemination A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow Q. How can you delay milk turning sour A. Keep it in the cow (Simple, but brilliant) Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. The abdomen) A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E, I,O,U.. (***!) Q. What is the fibula? A. A small lie Q. What does 'varicose' mean? A. Nearby Q. What is the most common form of birth control A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium (That would work) Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section' A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome Q. What is a seizure? A. A Roman Emperor. (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit) Q. What is a terminal illness A. When you are sick at the airport. (Irrefutable) Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning A. Hands that judicious can be soft as your face. (OMG) Q. What does the word 'benign' mean? A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight (brilliant) Q. What is a turbine? A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head {You Are Special} Enjoy your life! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GreyGhost Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 Kinda scary, eh ? Gregg Quote Link to post Share on other sites
HOLMES Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 OH DEAR !!! He's beyond help now.. THOSE answers .....WHAT A HOOT !!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Skyraider Maniac Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 thank goodness kids can get edumacated in pubic sckewls and gradeuate wit a hi levle of undersanding for da betterent of socioiety..... Seriously though - after years of mismanaging and dumbing down of the education system, are we really all that surprised by this? Seems like they're more interested in breeding a new generation of welfare... cause that's exactly where those kids are headed; quick, fast and in a hurry.... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Skyraider Maniac Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 OH DEAR !!!He's beyond help now.. THOSE answers .....WHAT A HOOT !!! I do agree though, they are quite laughable! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mark M. Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 Those have been on the Internet for a while. Another site says they're from 6th graders. I doubt they ever came from kids other than to illustrate humorous answers. Definitely not GED questions. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
frankv74 Posted July 29, 2010 Author Share Posted July 29, 2010 and these kids are our future leaders...... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
T-bone Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 Some of those answers are just hilarious! If you want to hear real scary answers to questions just hang around a Walmart and listen to some of the conversations amongst the patrons. An oh yes, they have usually already reproduced -- and in great numbers! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
camaroz06 Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 (edited) I'm pretty sure most (all) of these are joke answers. Why is everyone so quick to get down on the younger generations? Don't forget you old farts that your social security checks depend on our tax deductions!!! Edited July 29, 2010 by camaroz06 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jester292 Posted July 29, 2010 Share Posted July 29, 2010 I agree with Camaroz. Every 6 months or so something like this goes around and people lose a little more respect for the following generation. I'm not saying there aren't ignorant or unintelligent people graduating from public and private schools, but this isn't very believable. Aaron Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Wayne S Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 (edited) Answer from today's !6yr old's that chose to graduate earl, The following questions were set in last year's GED examination These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)............oh and ....they WILL breed! What does a GED Test have to do with graduating? Edited July 30, 2010 by Wayne S Quote Link to post Share on other sites
FAR148 Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 OMG!!! That made my day! Steven L <_< Quote Link to post Share on other sites
geedubelyer Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Great stuff! Thanks for sharing these frankv74 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Old Man Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Someone is having you on, Sir: G.E.D. questions are multiple choice format. The test is not an 'early graduation, either, but is for people trying to better themselves after dropping out of high school. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
pigsty Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Could anyone who feels like posting "yeah, typical" or "OMG their so stoopid these days, not like I wuz" or similar please first read the posts pointing out that this is (i) very, very old, and moreover (ii) almost certainly made up? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kevan Vogler Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Could anyone who feels like posting "yeah, typical" or "OMG their so stoopid these days, not like I wuz" or similar please first read the posts pointing out that this is (i) very, very old, and moreover (ii) almost certainly made up? I agree. This, and another one containing excerpts of creative writings from high school kids' English classes, have been doing the rounds for ages. things like this actually predate the internet by a good measure of time too. They all foster that pesimistic "We have no future" or "What's wrong with kids today" attitude. Yes, there are some kids out there that just will never make the cut. However, there are a lot of teachers out there who never should have made the cut but did, much to the detriment of the quality of education the youth of today receives. I know it isn't easy being a teacher; but it is even harder being stuck in a class with a teacher who has next to no passion for their subject, no energy to inspire their students with, no heart to properly recognise and reward a job well done and no inclination to address a mistake with anything more than humiliation. Those were my school days, good ridance to them. With teachers like that, what incentive does a student have to to really make a maximum effort? Then along comes things like what kicked this thread off. Every generation says "What's wrong with kids today?" However, if it's with things like this that we "entertain" ourselves with and the kids see us entertaining ourselves with it; is it really the kids we should be asking that question about, perhaps the question should be "What's wrong with us today?" Forgive me for going on a bit, but coming down on the youth is an issue quite close to me. The teenage years are some of the most awkward and frustrating times that there are in life. I remember my teenage years; the insecurities and uncertainties, the peer pressure was more intense than any I had experienced before or since......the last thing I needed was to see something like that list to remind me that there weren't too many folks with much faith in my generation and somehow they saw it as our fault. Some kids are bad, some indeed will go nowhere in life; but not nearly as many as you might think. Kids need support and they need to know someone is in their corner to help them get through difficulties they don't even know where to begin in sorting out. Whenever I see adults who have fond memories of their teenage years, I think they either must have been very popular at school or they have very short memories. You couldn't get me to take my teenage years back if you held me at gunpoint; I was glad to put them behind me. I don't have kids of my own, but I did do volunteer work at a youth shelter several years ago. Not all the kids left home to get away from abuse. Some left because there was simply no support structure to keep them there, their parents couldn't have cared less if they did schoolwork or not and didn't care to help them with difficulties at school, like bullying, that weren't connected to the schoolwork itself. the kids were basically alienated at home and saw no point in staying; sometimes when I met those kids' parents, I couldn't blame the kids for leaving home. If you have kids, particularly teens, they need to know you are there for them; they won't take it on faith, teenagers are by and large too full of uncertainties to do that. They need to see your faith in them, not just in words, but in action. Sit down with them regularly and ask how things are going at school and help them with their homework if they are obviously having difficulties; and don't wait for them to ask for help, quite often their uncertainties and lack of confidence won't make it easy or even possible to summon up the nerve to ask. The teenage years are hard. teenagers don't need anyone else to make them even harder for them. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
loftycomfort Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Q. How can you delay milk turning sourA. Keep it in the cow (Simple, but brilliant) That's a very zen answer from a 16 year old. I would never make fun of a teenager, cuz one day he/she could be my boss. Besides, no matter how wise or smart you think you are now, you were probably just as silly when you were their age. So cut them some slack please. Terry Quote Link to post Share on other sites
A-4Silverfox Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 SOMEONE has a career waiting in Hollywood, or as a national media news writer. B) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
F106A Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Along those same lines, did anyone see the "Faults alarm!!" correction to a post a few pages back? I'm just the messenger folks! Mark Quote Link to post Share on other sites
svaz Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 and these kids are our future leaders...... Nope. These are the future adults who will be spitting in your cheeseburger, angry at the social injustice that prevents them from driving home in a Bently. The kids who would be our future leaders either found a way to cheat, bribe the teacher, get someone smarter to take the test they got credit for, or found a way to avoid the test altogether. Not that I'm cynical or anything ... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom ordie Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Probably doesn't change much as they go through college years. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Edgar Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 Ummm, yes, before you get too far into breastbeating, and sackcloth-and-ashes mode, I'd like to point out that I heard the "judicious" one, sometime around 1970; it was a take on a TV advert, the jingle for which went "For hands that do dishes can feel soft as your face, with mild green Fairy Liquid." Thankfully, you can't hear me sing it. Edgar Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RiderFan Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 I remember another one of these 'tests' floating around the web for a while that was based on a math test written for LA gang members. Questions like; If Carlos is in a class with 12 girls, and he's knocked up 4 of them, what percentage of girls in class has Carlos knocked up? or If James' 9mm holds a 12 round clip, how many times will he need to reload to fire 65 rounds during the drive by. That sort of thing. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Fishwelding Posted July 30, 2010 Share Posted July 30, 2010 (edited) Why is everyone so quick to get down on the younger generations? Because they're under the mistaken impression that we once had a more educated society. If so, it was for about twenty minutes some time before inflation and bellyaching over the cost of schools took us back down. I've seen corporate job descriptions from 1931, for a broad range of blue collar and white collar jobs, from a big utility company. Really, they had guys doing all sorts of work with frankly lower standards than today. And of course, they didn't expect women to do much at all that required higher education, so there was an entire potential pool of talent in society that was willfully ignored. Hilariously, they thought married men were more "stable," and gave preference to them for some jobs. I'm not sure that was praise for married men, or not. Edited July 30, 2010 by Fishwelding Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Wayne S Posted July 31, 2010 Share Posted July 31, 2010 The real question is! Are 16 year-olds smarter then a 5th grader Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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