PhantomPhreakII Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 Modelers' Rules of Acquisition 1. You want it, therefore you need it. 2. You need it, therefore you must buy it. 3. All other things you need, including food, shelter, clothing, car insurance, and lunch money, are incidental in comparison to what you need for modeling. 4. Never add up the total for what you have purchased for modeling. 5. If you're not sure you should buy something....for *whatever* reason....if someone else says they have it and *like* it....then you *have* to buy it! 6. If you are compelled to calculate total dollars spent on modeling and related items, never count things that are not actual models. 7. Never include items that cannot be traced via the receipt (i.e. -- office supplies are office supplies, tape is tape -- never mind where it ends up in your house....) 8. When writing checks from the joint checking account, always write "K.G." in the check register. You will know that this stands for "Killer Goodies" but your SO will think it is Kroger Grocery when she scans the checkbook to see where you have been shopping. And she KNOWS groceries are expensive, and you need lots of them.... 9. If a member of your family discards an item that is usable for modeling, you may replace it. For example, you receive a shirt as a gift - if SO throws the shirt pins and clear plastic collar tabs away you may purchase replacements. You do not have to replace them with identical articles. This applies to Nestlé Crunch candy bar wrappers that your kids throw away too, however they are not permitted to eat the replacement candy! 10. If everyone else wants it, then you must want it too -- even if you don't know what it is. 11. If everyone else wants it, even if you don't know what it is, and you find it on sale, buy it ALL. (Editor's note: This phenomenon is widely known as the SALE factor, and is the only situation in which the Modeler may completely ignore Rules of Acquisition #6 and #7, and announce gleefully how much money he has SAVED by purchasing said items. (This suspending of the rules is dependent upon: a) the actual percentage off, the total dollar amount spent c) the projected reaction of partner/other interested party. For more detailed worksheet on Rule Suspension see Modelers' Rules of Acquisition Handbook - Chapter 9, Subsection C, Paragraph 14, and example on facing page.) 12. NEVER, NEVER let your SO read the Modeler's Rules of Acquisition...for reasons OBVIOUS to the seasoned modeler. For those of you who are newbies...does "the jig is up" mean anything to you? 13. Reconciling yourself early to the fact that every trip to the hobby shop costs a minimum of $40, even if your intentions were to buy just one decal sheet, will save you much anxiety and false guilt. 14. Grab bags MUST be purchased at the time they are advertised. There very likely could be that ONE special model you cannot live without, and the others work for trades! If you don't order immediately, you may lose that special kit. 15. Keep *everything*, no matter how useless or ugly or small it may be. It *will* become absolutely essential for a model project some day. 16. When you buy something, use it before you read the directions.* (*Acquisition reasoning -- if you mess it up or break it, you get to buy another one...) 17. You can't take it with you applies only to money. Begin getting your loved ones accustomed to the fact that you intend to be buried with your models. 18. Plastic models are an inexpensive hobby. This can be proved by applying male logic to your modeling purchases. For example, no hobby where the supplies usually cost under $10 can possibly be as expensive as the usual big ticket male hobbies such as radio controlled airplanes, restoring vintage automobiles, pro-team season tickets, etc. This just makes sense. 19. Every modeler MUST own every type of glue that is on the market. However, he may restrict use to his favorites. 20. Whenever a new paint line is made available, you must immediately purchase every one of the colors in which it comes. 21. When getting a model for a particular project it is imperative that you buy the same type from a variety of companies (a minimum of 3 is recommended). Once you actually sit down to build the model you will find that it is much better that you have not limited your selection to just one option. 22. It is essential to have ALL possible tools even if you know you won't use anything but your X-Acto knife. You never know when having the Tri-Tool saw blade #TT-37X4a will be PERFECT! 23. Get all types of paint, don't limit your creativity to just Model Master and Aeromaster. Make sure you have a good selection of Floquil, Humbrol, Xtracolor, and even the cheap Testors you buy at Wally Mart! 24. The iron is NOT for clothes; it is for making "weighted and bulged" tires. Anyone who uses an iron for clothes is excommunicated from the Modeler's Union. (Editor's note: You may avoid excommunication by following subsection B pursuant to rule #23 which in layman's terms translates as "you may use an iron for its original perverted purpose only by purchasing an auxiliary iron. However, only the old iron may be used for household purposes. Aforementioned perverted purpose is not one that is condoned by the Modeler's Union and should be performed ONLY by support staff personnel.) 25. Tissue paper is for making tarps and for hoarding. Never use it for packing material or for wrapping packages. 26. There is absolutely NO such thing as too many modeling magazines...of any kind. Disregard nasty comments about the twenty years worth of Scale Models stashed in the boxes at the back of the garage. 27. Corollaries here are: a-the complete set of Scale Models is worth the $1500...they are actually priceless. b-it is perfectly acceptable to save not only anything remotely usable, but also all the junk no one else wants...c-EVERYTHING is parts box fodder and should be purchased and/or saved. Especially any broken plastic or metal toys...d-"Reference Material". If you think that you will ever build a model of this airplane/car/tank/ship you must buy the book now for reference because it will not be available when you really need it...e-Decals! You can never have enough decals. So what if you need 150 F-4 kits or 238 Bf-109 kits to use all of them. HisAirDec and ABT decals are historical items and should be cherished. 28. If you think there is a ghost of a chance that you might use it in a future project, buy it now. Cause if you need it later, you can bet a) you won't be able to find it, B) no one will have heard of it and c) there won't be a substitute. 29. A modeler must purchase appropriate storage containers, shelves, bins, units, etc., for all modeling related purchases. A modeler has the right and responsibility to discard all previously purchased storage systems in order to purchase a new, more appropriate system at any time. 30. A corollary to number 18 above: Modeling actually saves money. Modeling promotes the do-it-yourself philosophy. This is evident in the activities of molding, carving, and casting your own parts, and making your own toys. 31. Modeling is your civic duty. Think globally, act locally. Purchasing models and supplies is politically correct for the following reasons: a) It supports a local business and reduces the number of unemployed; it promotes creativity and cottage industry; c) it supports minority owned businesses (if modelers aren't a minority, who are?); d) buying expensive, imported model kits stimulates the economies of developing nations; Thus purchasing models is your civic duty. It logically follows that the world would be a better place if everyone built models. Write your congressmen today to begin the process of passing legislation making it illegal not to build models. 32. If you happen upon a super model-related deal somewhere and you buy enough for you and all your friends, and your friends buy some from you--the money they give you is free to be used to purchase MORE model stuff, since it has been " laundered" and isn't, technically, coming out of your pocket! 33. You must subscribe to every modeler's magazine whether or not you ever have time to read any of them. The pictures are always nice to look at and give you ideas for more model purchases you need to make. 34. You must spend thousands of dollars on a home computer, a fast modem, and an internet account so you can get online to visit all the modeling websites and get the latest hobby information. Only then will know where you can save $1.50 on your next model acquisition. This will indeed justify the total cost of your computer. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hajo L. Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 I love rules #31 and #34! HAJO Quote Link to post Share on other sites
2qwik4u Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 Love it. Does this mean I'm MAU (Modeler's Acquisition University) certified now? Do I get a certificate? -Dave Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ro-Gar Hobbies Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 This should be a sticky in General discussion. Because I basically follow these rules to the "T" ! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Joe Hegedus Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 Regarding item 15 - it ONLY becomes essential to a future project once you throw it away. Otherwise, it just sits in the bin. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gonzalo Posted October 17, 2015 Share Posted October 17, 2015 A modeler must pay the highest shipping price to receive a shipped model as fast as possible so the modeler can receive the model open it look at it and then stick it in the stash to be built at another determined time, which is far later then the time it would have taken if the cheapest shipping cost was selected. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nspreitler Posted October 18, 2015 Share Posted October 18, 2015 When buying models on ebay it is necessary to buy more than one in order to save money with combined shipping, regardless if you need/want the second model. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Uncle Uncool Posted October 18, 2015 Share Posted October 18, 2015 A modeler must pay the highest shipping price to receive a shipped model as fast as possible so the modeler can receive the model open it look at it and then stick it in the stash to be built at another determined time, which is far later then the time it would have taken if the cheapest shipping cost was selected. True... true... Aw, so painfully true... :lol: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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